i see some brightness this time around.
having brought myself around so many false dawns, i know better than to think that this is going to be the finale. paradoxically, this beginning files as something completely more achievable and real compared to the past.
i never managed to see much of the benefits in letting others know my issues. its not so much about the severity of it that held me back, it was the pointlessness. nobody would be able to do anything about it anyway.
but i’ve somebody now, who sees right through me. even when i’m wearing clothes. thick, clothes. its like sunshine through the storm.
my light, unlike any other
it may not always be so;
and i say that if your lips,
which i have loved should touch another’s,
and your dear strong fingers clutch his heart,
as mine in time not far away;
if on another’s face your sweet hair lay
in such silence as i know,
or such great writhing words as,
uttering overmuch,
stand helplessly before the spirit at bay;
if this should be, i say if this should be—
you of my heart, send me a little word;
that i may go unto him, and take his hands,
saying, Accept all happiness from me.
Then shall i turn my face and hear one bird
sing terribly afar in the lost lands.
